I finished my fourth novel! This has been an emotional month for many reasons, finishing my novel being one of them. I am not one who deals with emotions very well (or understands them well) and this month has been an especially emotional one. This has slowed me down in my writing after finishing the novel but has also allowed me to dip into some of my hobbies as I await getting this novel back from my writing group.
Finishing My First Draft and How I Got Here
I came up with the idea for this novel in mid-January and I started drafting it at the beginning of February. I took most of March and the beginning of April off as I had some extra stressors that were sapping my energy and I finished the novel on June 17th. I technically wrote it in four and a half months but in one of those months, I didn’t really write. I am extremely proud of this timeline, even though there have had some bumps along the way (as there usually are).
One of the cool things about this process is that I wrote 11k words in one Saturday in order to finish the book. I wrote for 12 hours that day (with breaks each hour as well as to eat). I pretty much caught up to where I wanted to be if I hadn’t had the flu last month, which means I’m sort of on track. I finished the draft about when I wanted to, but I also decided to do a second round of revisions with my writing group before sending it to Betas which will slow me down a month or so. I’m still hoping to start querying by the end of September.
I couldn’t be more excited at the prospect that this might be the story that I’m able to publish. I hope with all my heart that it will be and I plan to make it the best book it can be in these rounds of revisions in order to get it published. Each finished novel feels like a little part of me. They are truly my children and I couldn’t be prouder in finishing my fourth novel.
The Emotional Effect
Every time I finish a novel I have this moment of emptiness as the story that has occupied my brain for so long makes its final exit. (of course, it really isn’t the end because I have plenty of edits and rewriting to do). This empty feeling can be difficult to deal with, after all, it’s a feeling and all feelings feel bad because I do not understand them well.
This is something I am working on both for myself and my writing. Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve had to sit with quite a lot of big feelings. Some of them were good and some of them were bad but in the course of four days, I had a few things happen that rocked me, one of which was finishing this novel. I am just coming down off of some of these emotions while others persist, but I already know that this is probably a good thing for my writing.
One of the major critiques that arose from my writing group is the lack of emotion throughout the story. Crazy and traumatic things would happen to my characters and the emotional weight didn’t sit right. I am hopeful, as I head into my first round of revision in the coming week, that I can lean on my own emotions to bring my characters’ emotions to life.
Other Things I Did this month
The emotions of finishing the novel as well as the two weeks between when I finished the novel and when my writing group will finish it, have given me some time to do other things. I’ve been working on more art. I pulled out my knitting and finally learned the basics of how to crochet, I’ve been singing a lot more (I’d taken a bit of an unintentional break due to the flu and then a persistent cough), and I even pulled out and played my cello until it made my arm sore.
Sometimes (most of the time) I get so focused on writing that everything else fades away into the background. I’ve said it on many occasions, I live in my mind to the point that I forget that I physically exist. Many things have brought me into the present, proved my existence to myself, and made me aware of what is going on around me. This is a mixed bag for me. I escape to my mind for a reason and being foisted into the present and physical space has been extremely anxiety-inducing. For a bit, I was unable to access the writing part of my brain. It was as if I’d been disconnected from the very thing that gives me life.
When I couldn’t write, I had a lot of time to fill. Fortunately, I have many interests and I could pick up, but my anxiety only grows when I can’t write. It is my preferred hyper fixation.
Stats
Even though I had a bit of turmoil in the second half of the month, I’ve still successfully written 50k words this month. This just goes to show how much I wrote in the first two and a half weeks. This is my second most written month of the year and I’m at 233k words for the first half of the year which puts me ahead of my goal to write 1k words per day for the whole year or 365k words. This is exactly where I want to be because I know that in the next month or two I will not get many words written since I’ll be doing revisions and revision words are difficult to track since I will delete and add at almost the same pace. That is part of why I wrote so heavily in the first part of the year, to average it out and reach my goal for the full year.
Future Projects
My future projects are still a little ways off, however, I have started brainstorming it and drafting the first little bit of the first chapter. I can already say that Elanore and Margot are great characters even though I don’t know them well yet. I’m shooting for around 50k for the new novel, however, the one I just finished was supposed to be 70k and ended up at 133k and the one before that was supposed to be 43k and ended up at 71k. So we’ll see if I’m actually able to write something that short.
I also have a couple more days until I’m able to start my reread of my novel after I get it back from my writing group, so I have a short story that I’m going to work on. All I have for that one is the first line but it’s a pretty good one if I do say so myself.
I find myself anticipating my reread of my novel with excitement, although I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t any fear there. I’ve never done a revision quite this aggressive before and revision isn’t my favorite thing anyway, but I know this book will be better for it and bring more enjoyment to its readers. That alone is worth the work.
